Are You Special?
"Deal with yourself as an individual worthy of respect, and make everyone else deal with you the same way." - Nikki Giovanni.
I believe that you are a piece of the universe, whether you are physically alive or dead. Your consciousness is energy, and energy cannot be destroyed. Let's view the universe as an ocean with width and depth, constantly in motion. See yourself as a particle of light floating somewhere in this universe's ocean. Your little particle has billions of tiny rays of light shining outwards in all directions, and goes as far as it has the power to go. Your rays of light are not all the same color or intensity; each one represents a different aspect of yourself. Maybe you have one pointing west that is gold-colored, intensely brilliant, that stretches on forever. Maybe the one pointing south is faintly purple and barely there. The particles next to you have their own little rays, and where you meet, they become mixed, and a new color and intensity are formed. This becomes your environment.
As you can see, you may have control over the color and intensity of your light (self-awareness), but not the effect that it has as it mixes with the lights around you. This is why two children raised in the same home by the same parents can have very different experiences. This is why someone thinks that you are brilliant and another thinks that you are an idiot.
Are you special? Yes, because you are a conscious particle that makes up our universe (you do not have to earn your spot). Yes, because you have control over the color and intensity of your light. No, because so does everyone else. Does the universe need you to be brilliant? No, it will drag you along whether you are trying to be awesome or not. You can weakly exist, holding your place with no influence on other particles, and everything will continue along just fine. You can influence others for evil and darken your interactions with them, and the universe will let you draw the darkness to you like a black hole. Maybe it is the realization of our influence that makes us believe we are special.
If our sense of ‘specialness’ is not inherent but constructed, where did this belief begin? There have been various ideas discussed throughout time regarding what led humankind to believe they are special. Some have argued that the problem that has contributed to our feelings of specialness has been the introduction of language, religion, and personal property. Since personal property is a factor, no matter what language or religion you are, I will focus on it. Once it became the way the world works, people have done all sorts of terrible things to other humans to acquire more. We see others and admire what they have. We compare and feel bad that we don't have that, so we try to get more. We use this accumulation of property to segregate ourselves and show how different we are. The problem is that almost everything we get a big head over can be taken away, and if we put too much value on them, we feel shame when they are gone. "Pride is not the opposite of shame, but it's source. True humility is the only antidote to shame." -Uncle Iroh, Avatar: The Last Airbender (popularized widely online). I guess that worrying about ourselves and how we are perceived causes us to feel separate. "Humility is not thinking less of yourself. It's thinking of yourself less."- C.S. Lewis.
The biggest factor that determines success in our physical world is not IQ, gender, or education; it is location. When, where, and to whom you are born is not within your control, so to feel superior to your fellow man for your good fortune is misguided. "Pride is that which claims to be the author of what is really a gift." - Tim Keller. Location may set the stage, but individual choice directs the performance. Often, those who came from bad environments will tell you that 'they 'pulled themselves out of the situation. In a way, this is true. If you are in a certain place, and you move, you will carry that energy with you unless you change it somewhere along the way. If you cannot physically move, you must adjust the color and intensity of your light so that it has an impact when it mixes with the surrounding lights. They will either accept the change or feel uncomfortable and move away. This is still creating separation. Can there be a human experience without it?
"I was no longer needing to be special, because I was no longer so caught in my puny separateness that had to keep proving I was something. I was part of the Universe, like a tree, or like grass is, or like water is." -Ram Dass. The important thing to remember about this is that nature is interconnected. The grass does not need to think it is a tree; both just need to coexist, letting each do its thing. One is not more special than the other, and all things are needed to make the ecosystem work, including thorns and storms. In the end, either we are all special and have a place in the universe or none of us are. "To make something special, you just have to believe it's special." - Mr. Ping, Kung Fu Panda.
If we do not value others' light because it is different, it will not cause them to be any less needed by an intelligence far greater than our own. "If I could tell you one thing, it would be this: Not everyone needs to dazzle. Some of us are here to observe gently, to offer biscuits and warm smiles, to clap for others without needing the spotlight. There's beauty in not being the loudest voice in the room. There's quiet power in showing up every day, being kind, and not needing to be noticed." - Elizabeth Warden. There is a certain relief in finding out that you do not need to keep trying to be the best at everything. That you can exist in your space peacefully, without having to prove your worth. "When you don't want to be interesting, you are free." - Mooji. You do not have to be extra to be special.
Love and Hope,
Big Sky Baby