Why So Much Stuff?

"We have traded our freedom for overfilled closets and our passions for unnecessary maintenance. We have too quickly sacrificed life in pursuit of clutter." - Joshua Becker Why do we collect so much stuff? I remember as a child getting catalogs in the mail and poring over the glossy pictures for hours. I wanted all the toys, the doll, clothes, accessories, baby buggy, bed and kitchen. I did not stop with toys, though. I wanted the good China, fancy glasses, silverware, a tablecloth, napkins, napkin rings, candles, a big table with matching chairs, and a flower arrangement for the center. Don't get me started on the bedroom sets. To me, this is what it took to make a home, everything staged and perfect.

I have ended up collecting and getting rid of more than my fair share of 'stuff' throughout the years. This has led me to question whether our consumerism-based society has somehow misled us. "I'm beginning to suspect that the second half of life is about learning to let go of everything I feverishly collected over the first half that wasn't loving or human." - Michael Xavier I have watched minimalist shows, sometimes with interest and sometimes with disbelief, trying to get into a different mindset. Being a person with a large family, and also a person who likes to throw parties and entertain groups, cutting down my house to the bare minimum will never happen. Yes, I do only use that bunt pan twice a year, but when I do, it makes me happy. "Enough is a decision, not an amount." - Alison Faulkner And it is your decision, not for anyone else to make. Still, there are many problems that come along with ownership. Here are a few-

1. It requires money to put together certain styles and more money to change them out when they fall out of fashion. Our consumerism economy is based entirely on us buying and then replacing most of our possessions and I have done my best to help support the economy. Our landfills are filled with not just garbage but throwaway clothes, furniture, electronics, appliances, housewares, and toys (pretty sure that is where all kid's meal toys end up). We have been conditioned from an early age to want all the things. This affects our world and it's resources, but we can fight back. Terence McKenna bluntly reminds us to be conscious of what we are buying when he says, "Reclaim your mind and get it out of the hands of the cultural engineers who want to turn you into a half-baked moron consuming all this trash that's being manufactured out of the bones of a dying world." - Terence McKenna
2. Ownership takes time out of our lives to organize, clean, and maintain. "The more you have, the more occupied you are. The less you have, the more free you are." - Mother Theresa One of the ways that I have been known to occupy my time is in trying to find better ways to organize the piles of stuff. Podcasts, books, articles, buying different-sized containers, label making, learning fancy ways to fold clothes so they take up less space, etc. It's a good time. Looking back, I can optimistically use all this information as a failed learning experience. Looking forward, though, requires me to be more realistic about my ability to organize, clean, and maintain my family's possessions. "Stop trying to organize all of your families crap. If organization worked for you, you'd have rocked it by now. It's time to ditch stuff and de-crapify your world." - Becoming UnBusy
3. Having many possessions can overwhelm you and stress you out. Everyone will have a different tolerance for the amount of possessions that can be acquired before the anxiety of caring for them sets in. The amount will fluctuate throughout the years as you go through different stages of your life. "When you are overwhelmed, tired or stressed, the solution is almost always... less. Get rid of something. Lots of somethings." - bemorewithless.com I had more energy and hope when I was younger. I still like the idea of throwing elaborate dinner parties, but the actual doing is happening at fewer intervals. Someday, I will be content to let someone else throw the party and I'll just bring ice and drinks.
4. The type and amount of hobbies you have will impact the amount of stuff you collect. "I have come to the conclusion that buying craft supplies and actually using them are two separate hobbies." - Queen & Co Humor aside, there is a lot of truth in that statement. We buy things to reinforce an identity we have about ourselves (dancer, artist, fan), and for the person we think we will be in the future. There is a possibility that the identity we are buying for isn't who we are, but just a dream of who we wish we were. I read some advice once that said if you have a hobby and you won't/can't spend 15 minutes a day or the equivalent on it, let it go, you aren't really that into it. Don't hang onto it just because you think you'll do it "someday" when you have time. Be prepared though, there is some grief involved in letting go of the person you thought you were, but aren't/can't be anymore. It will be okay though, you might find something you like even better. "Waking up to who you are requires letting go of who you imagine yourself to be." - Alan Watts

No one wants your stuff. If you don't need it, let go of it now. My mother died last February. She had many interests and hobbies. She also had many collections. My sisters (for weeks) and I (barely) helped my father sort through her stuff, enough to fill their two-story home. Rooms full of items she had not seen or used in years, but would not give to anyone or let go of. We made countless trips to the second-hand store to drop off truckloads of things that none of us wanted. "A sad truth to help you shop less and declutter more- Eventually someone you love will have to decide what to do with every item you own. Someday, sooner or later, all of your belongings will be handled, sorted, kept, sold, tossed, or donated. Is that a responsibility we want to leave to the people we care about?" Pinterest, ericalayne.co/lighter We had tried to help her organize her things in the years leading up to her death, but were always met with considerable resistance and hostility. I recently watched a YouTube video on this subject and found her advice to be thoughtful and not quite what I expected to hear. Here is the link if you are going through something similar. "Leaving junk to a family is often more an act of revenge than of love." - Don Aslett, Clutter's Last Stand I guess I better get to work! If you liked the quotes used today, they are all on printable paper, here is the link!

Love and hope,

Big Sky Baby