Your Path

I love to find a mystery path when I am out walking. If I have time, I will take it to see where it goes. If I don't, I will continue on the one leading to my destination telling myself that someday, I will come back and see where the other path goes. I rarely do though. Humans have been comparing life to a journey forever and that journey seems to involve travelling on some paths. Many people make a living out of giving advice on which path leads to success. There are others who will advise not to stay on the path, but to forge your own. Both versions require that you take some action. "We waste time and energy waiting for a path to appear, but it never does. Because we forget that paths are made by walking, not waiting. And we forget that there's absolutely nothing about our present circumstances that prevents us from making progress again, one tiny step at a time." - marcandangel

To make progress, we will have to pick a direction because as the Cheshire Cat from Alice in Wonderland tells us, "If you don't know where you want to go, then it doesn't matter which path you take." This picking a direction seems to paralyze some people. What if they pick the wrong one? Often the paths people choose to bring about the fastest success are other people's paths, broad, well-worn, proven and crowded with others trying to reach the same coveted destination. There is nothing wrong with that, the destinations are coveted for a reason. I will give an example of the classic American home with a white picket fence, dog, and two kids. There are millions of people who desired, obtained, and loved their choice. Let's try to work out which path advice is the best.

Is there a correct path that you must take? "Let yourself be silently drawn by the strange pull of what you really love. It will not lead you astray." - Rumi I have came across many that are so out of touch with themselves that they can't say what it is they really love and others that are too scared to leave the path they are on to risk another. The best advice I can give is to just pick a path and start walking. Your path will not be clear but every fork will be a chance at a new adventure, a choice that could possibly change your direction drastically. Don't worry when this happens, you will find your way, keep moving. "As you start to walk on the way... the way appears." -Rumi There is no sense in second guessing yourself. Yes, there are thousands of possible outcomes for each choice made but did you really miss out by making one that did not work out the way you thought it should have? "Every path is the right path. Everything could've been anything else and it would have just as much meaning." - Tennessee Williams

Can we judge others as stupid who are taking difficult paths?- If we are judging others than we are comparing them to someone else, usually ourselves. "Don't judge a man by where he is because you don't know how far he has come." - unknown We all think that if we just take the correct path, our lives will go as planned. When other people choose a path that we don't agree with, it's easy to say that they made bad choices. I asked ChatGPT if the outcome of your life due to your actions is quantifiable and here's what it said- "It's challenging to put an exact number on the variables because life is a mix of structured choices and randomness. However, research in sociology and psychology suggests that:

• Around 30-50% of life outcomes can be attributed to factors like education, socioeconomic status, and conscious decisions.
• The remaining 50-70% involves unpredictable variables such as health, personal relationships, and chance encounters."

The numbers fascinate me. 50-70% of the outcome of your carefully planned life is up to factors that you probably have little to no control over. Maybe we should be a little more forgiving and understanding of each other.

There are people that will take a difficult path on purpose. Some spiritual practices recommend that you choose the hard path to overcome yourself. "The obstacle is the path." - Zen Proverb When I have a destination that requires me to climb a steep trail, I know that I like to meet it head on and power my way up. Now if I could just do it with my diet.

Should you try and forge your own path?- People will get uncomfortable when they start to see someone making a new path. Someone must do it though, it is how we exceed the boundaries of what is possible. Traditions, habits, fear of change to the way things have always been done are our babies that we want to protect often at the expense of progress. "Our wretched species is so made that those who walk the well-trodden path always throw stones at those who are showing a new road." - Voltaire, Dictionnaire Philosophique, (1764) Allowing others You may go so far down a path that you find the end and have to start another. "Ultimately, you must forget about technique. The further you progress, the fewer teachings there are. The Greater Path is really No Path." - O'Sensei Morihei Ueshiba Masters of anything will need to walk virgin ground.

What if you end up on a path not of your choosing?- "It's not a simple path to survive the things that felt like death, but didn't kill you." - Stacie Martin I have hiked difficult, stone-filled mountain trails that required me to stop and gasp for breath every 20 feet but it was my choice to be there. If I stepped on a loose rock and tumbled back down to the bottom, it would still be a consequence of a choice that I made. If someone pushed me off course or the trail suddenly gave away, I would be in for a ride that I did not choose. When this happens, your attitude may be your only defense. "If your path demands you to walk through hell, walk as if you own the place." - unknown While you are walking confidently through hell, you can take your mind off the heat by contemplating how this path might lead somewhere better. "Once we're thrown off our habitual paths, we think all is lost, but it's only here that the new and the good begins." - Leo Tolstoy Sounds like an adventure.

Should you be worried because you seem to be stuck on the same path?- Routine can be a comfortable stroll or an endless plodding towards death. When it seems the later, lift your chin, take a deep breath and start looking around, you will feel better. "The better you feel, the more you will be able to see paths that were not available to you before, and it's not because the path changes; it's because you change and now you can see it." - Abraham Hicks If you feel like you have been walking in circles, its possible that you have not finished the lesson that path had to teach you. "The path isn't a straight line. It's a spiral. You will come back to things you thought you understood and see deeper truths." - unknown

What if we can't find our path?- "Sometimes the people with the greatest potential often take the longest to find their path because their sensitivity is a double edged sword- it lives at the heart of their brilliance, but it also makes them more susceptible to life's pains. Good thing we aren't being penalized for handing in our purpose late. The soul doesn't know a thing about deadlines." - Jeff Brown There are paths that we will walk alone and these paths are ours. Some people will spend most of their life on paths interacting with others, either by choice or not. There will also be times when a person can walk a crowded path without connecting with anyone. This aloneness while surrounded will make you feel like you are lost, that you are on the wrong path. Lost and alone- sounds like you are undergoing distress or hardship, which is the meaning of suffering. "We need suffering in order to see the path. The origin of suffering, the cessation of suffering, and the path leading to the cessation of suffering are all found at the heart of suffering. If we are afraid to touch our suffering, we will not be able to realize the path of peace, joy, and liberation. Don't run away. Touch your suffering and embrace it. Make peace with it." -Thich Nhat Hanh

What if people who started out on the path with us are no longer there?- "People choose the direction in which they wish to grow, though the path may change. They seek a partner who aligns or complements that journey. Challenges arise when no direction is chosen- or when paths diverge without reconciliation." - unknown Family, friends, lovers, wouldn't it be nice to hold their hands and walk bravely together into the future? There is something wrong with the human thought process though (well mine at least). This fault lies in expectations. We get into all sorts of relationships expecting a certain outcome and then are surprised and angry that it did not work out that way. The Dalai Lama has given us a good example saying, "I am open to the guidance of synchronicity, and I do not let expectations hinder my path." - Dalai Lama

Which path advice did you decide was best? We can't go through life without walking the path of others, which is good because sometimes we do not have the strength to forge our own. We can't escape walking alone either. When your life is over, the paths you walked won't look like anyone else's even if they were walking beside you most of the way. "Do not compare, do not measure. No other way is like yours. All other ways deceive and tempt you. You must fulfill the way that is in you." - Carl Jung I spend most of my time wandering lost, hence the name of this blog. I am hopeful that I will look up often enough to find others and we can be lost together. Maybe we can leave some directions to help others navigate the over the tricky parts. One thing I know for certain is that "Some beautiful paths can't be discovered without getting lost." - Erol Ozan. I created free printable quote sheets you can download here.

Love and Hope,

Big Sky Baby